About Michael Smalley
My passion is help you get it, so your relationships don't completely stress you out! That's why "
The DNA of Relationships" study is so important, or the book my wife and I barely survived writing (because we are so different...we almost killed each other. You'll have to read the book to understand.), will revolutionize the way you resolve conflict. "
The Surprising Way to a Stronger Marriage". Click on the links to learn more about those resources and find more that will help you love each other like you never dreamed possible!
In listening to “You don’t have to focus on the negative” the comfirmation bias caught my ear. My wife and I are separated and she is 600 miles away and refuses to comunicate in any form. She says she is done. I drove up to where she is staying with her kids and tried to talk to her. I bairly got to because her daughter was in the middle and wouldnt let us talk. But at that time and 1 other time we did talk she said we have never had any happy times and she hasn’t been happy the whole 5 years we’ve been together. I have pictures from hiking picnics we went on just a year and half ago. And she has told me in the beginning and 3 years ago that I was a special man and that it was really nice to be able to say “I love you ” and mean it in every since of the word. How is it now that she can say she has never been happy and didnt love me??? Is this comfirmation bias?? How can I get her to come out of it. I have read “Winning Your Wife Back Before It’s Too Late” and “the surprising way to a stronger Marriage” and I am certain we can have a wonderful relationship. If she would just unlock. What can I do?? Every podcast I have listened to and article and book I have read from you is absolutely great and has taught me so much, but it just isn’t doing me any good if she doesn’t hear it.
When someone is hurting, they feel and think lots of things…many times things that aren’t fun or helpful. But your focus can’t be on getting her to open up to you, it must remain on making changes to your own self, and then asking from time to time if she’s open to meeting with you. If she’s not, be patient, if she’s mean, be kind, if she’s hurtful, be encouraging. You can never lose if you do the right thing and honor God and her in everything you do.